The True Visual Effects of Abuse

We never know the actual trauma and exact effects of abuse. It can hide in the darkest corners of your nearest neighborhood, your mayor's office, down the street at your local bar or even at your local church. Yes, violence can disguise itself in many shapes, many people, many experiences, and many opportunities. But let's be clear Abuse and Violence has no bias, it does not discriminate. It doesn't care of your age, your gender, your status, your political affiliation, your race, your religion, or your economic status. Violence is just Violence, it just plain hates, no matter the appearance of it. If we look at humanity throughout the ages, we can see that we have transformed ourself. We as humans have evolved into a species that has grasped the evolution of hatred and malice. And although there are particular occasions that we can show great feet of good loving kindness. We are starting to lose the inability to feel the basic instincts of great compassion. Sometimes, our mandate of un-remorseable lawlessness to appease our generation is stronger than that of human kindness. We make excuses for killing babies, we make excuses for sodomy and rapist and call them, "morally upright and law-abiding in life."
We even question the morality of the structure of human decency in the sanctity of marriages, families, the care of social equality and the treatment of each person principles. It has gotten necessary and disgusting that human life has taken a back seat because we like to use morality as the basis of our own platforms. Although, we see crying children, helpless mothers, gun violence, racial tension, religious divide, political indifferences, and human biases. I believe if we cannot take a grasp on these personal divides and agendas, we will never be able to take a hold on the issues of Domestic Violence. Ever. And the Issues of childhood trauma, suicide, and sexual trafficking; these issues are more significant than one group, one nation, and one person can undertake. We need personal deliverance and a personal manifestation of healing to this country like never before.
Martin Luther King said it best when he said,
" The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, 
begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy.
Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it.
Through violence, you may murder the liar,
but you cannot murder the lie, nor establish the truth.
Through violence, you may murder the hater,
but you do not murder hate.
In fact, violence merely increases hate.
So it goes.
Returning violence for violence multiplies violence,
adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars.
Darkness cannot drive out darkness:
only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

I got a fantastic opportunity to work with a great photographer in Connecticut  Nikki Lyn Amatruda, and her excellent work with the models and makeup artist in Connecticut for the Intimate Partner Violence PSA calendar,

I do have to warn you some pictures are very explicit in nature, so I AM PLACING A WARNING to anyone because of the graphic quality.  But what surprised me was the tenacity, the love, and compassion all these women and how they loved one another. I was touched by the loving kindness that each woman had for one another and how they reach out to share their stories. It really places this PSA at a particular moment in time to let the world know of what they faced. Many of them years before, many of them months earlier, and many of them just a couple of weeks, but we all can attest this is a time capsule of pain. Knowing that this pain is no longer available but tucked away until needed for our next advocacy moment. They were strong and purely spectacular women. I am so thankful to have known each and every one of them. If you get an opportunity please stop and check out Nikki's closer images online and many of these amazing women. I hope you will become part of the fantastic Domestic Violence Rally Movement. It has not been easy, but each voice together can mean a grand scale of a collective movement to show peoples stories. This Vigil in each state will show that we are going to seize anonymity and complacency and choose to stand for what is right and what is RIGHTEOUS.

God bless and stay safe in America.

                                                 PHOTOS BY   Nikki Lyn Amatruda

                                                                              Click the link to view larger photos.

                  

                                       

                   
                                                               

                                    

      

                      

                                                    

                                      
                                       

 

Psychological / Mental Abuse difficult to address but it's a problem in our society.

This I believe is a hugely controversial abuse and assault because it can be depicted as being the same thing as emotional abuse. Many speculate that it can be one in the same then many say it's in a class of it's own. You need to make that determination yourself.

Many define it as:

• Name calling 
• Put-downs
• Subjecting or exposing another to behavior that may result in psychological trauma, including anxiety, chronic depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder
• Rejecting, degrading, terrorizing, isolating, corrupting/exploiting and "denying emotional responsiveness

Many can speculate that this behavior although has been categorized as a Psychological can also fall under emotional abuse and assault. 

It's common to find that many of these traits can be found among family members and children. What we don't know is that these traits can also be found at the school levels and also in the work force. 

Many individuals climbing the corporate ladder use many Psychological  tactics to throw their opponents off. In a word, to sike them out! Although many adults have grown from using such tactics, many resort to subjecting or exposing another for self gain. Whether for personal or financial reasons they find these tactics give them a great boost in life.

What they might not realize is that these psychological intents can cause long lasting damage in a persons life if not addressed immediately. 

Psychological Abuse written by Natasha Tracy in "www.healthyplace.com" states:

Psychological abuse, though, can be just as devastating as physical abuse. Psychological abuse can affect your inner thoughts and feelings as well as exert control over your life. You may feel uncertain of the world around you and unsafe in your own home. Psychological abuse can destroy intimate relationships, friendships and even your own relationship with yourself.

Psychological abuse signs and symptoms may start small at first as the abuser "tests the waters" to see what the other person will accept, but before long the psychological abuse builds into something that can be frightening and threatening.

Also addressed in  NCADV.org statistic show that:

· 95% of men who physically abuse their intimate

   partners also psychologically abuse them.

· Psychologically abusive men are more likely to

use a weapon against their partners, have prior

criminal arrests, abuse substances, and have

employment problems.

· An employed woman with an unemployed

partner is more than twice as likely to be

psychologically abused by her partner.

· Having a physical disability increases a

woman’s risk of psychological abuse by 83%.

· Women who earn 65% or more of their

households’ income are more likely to be

psychologically abused.

In the workforce this is a highly common abuse but rarely addressed. We do know now that if you are being psychologically, mentally or verbally abuse you have rights. Your rights have to be addresses to your corporation or business and if that request goes unaddressed you have the right to contact a lawyer. The Chron.com Small Business and Worker's Rights states:

Unlike most first-world countries, there are currently no federal or state laws written to protect U.S. employees from verbal abuse. However, failure to nip an abusive employee's behavior in the bud can cost you big. Under regulations from the federal Occupational Safety and Health Act, or OSHA, you as a business owner can be held liable for not providing an employee with a safe and healthy workplace. An employee faced with verbal abuse can fairly claim that the abuse interferes with her ability to go about her daily job duties. You can be held responsible for retaining the services of an employee who verbally abuses another employee.

If an employee who has been verbally abused is not adequately aided at the company level, she may hire an attorney to take her case to court. Even without precise laws on the books that address the issue, OSHA standards seem to have enough bite to get the attention of courts. For example, the Indiana Supreme Court in 2008 awarded a nurse $325,000 for her claims of intentional infliction of emotional distress and assault after she was screamed at by a surgeon. Once you've heard a hint of abuse occurring within your business, you become part of the problem. You must either address it head on or be prepared to answer for your failure to do so.

This can cost a hefty sum if you are a business owner. 

It is important to understand that to have a balance work environment, a healthy home life and a happy mental attitude you must first learn how to properly address all individuals. And although it is true that we are humans and we do have a tendency to disagree and have different opinions, there should NEVER be a place where you have to put another down to get your point across.

In Psalms 109:1-3 David calls to the Lord saying:

"1 Hold not thy peace, O God of my praise; 2 for the mouth of the wicked and the mouth of the deceitful are opened against me: they have spoken against me with a lying tongue.3 They compassed me about also with words of hatred; and fought against me without a cause."

I read this one time and shared it with my boys always THINK before speaking:

T-Is it True?

H-Is it Helpful or Honest?

I-Is It Inspiring?

N-Is it Necessary?

K-Is it KIND?

If it doesn't fall under any of those guidelines is best not say it at all!