Monday, May 27, 2013

Psychological / Mental Abuse difficult to address but it's a problem in our society.

This I believe is a hugely controversial abuse and assault because it can be depicted as being the same thing as emotional abuse. Many speculate that it can be one in the same then many say it's in a class of it's own. You need to make that determination yourself.

Many define it as:

  • Name calling 
  • Put-downs
  • Subjecting or exposing another to behavior that may result in psychological trauma, including anxiety, chronic depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder
  • Rejecting, degrading, terrorizing, isolating, corrupting/exploiting and "denying emotional responsiveness
Many can speculate that this behavior although has been categorized as a Psychological can also fall under emotional abuse and assault. 
It's common to find that many of these traits can be found among family members and children. What we don't know is that these traits can also be found at the school levels and also in the work force. 
Many individuals climbing the corporate ladder use many Psychological  tactics to throw their opponents off. In a word, to sike them out! Although many adults have grown from using such tactics, many resort to subjecting or exposing another for self gain. Whether for personal or financial reasons they find these tactics give them a great boost in life.

What they might not realize is that these psychological intents can cause long lasting damage in a persons life if not addressed immediately. 
Psychological Abuse written by Natasha Tracy in "www.healthyplace.com" states:
Psychological abuse, though, can be just as devastating as physical abuse. Psychological abuse can affect your inner thoughts and feelings as well as exert control over your life. You may feel uncertain of the world around you and unsafe in your own home. Psychological abuse can destroy intimate relationships, friendships and even your own relationship with yourself.
Psychological abuse signs and symptoms may start small at first as the abuser "tests the waters" to see what the other person will accept, but before long the psychological abuse builds into something that can be frightening and threatening.

Also addressed in  NCADV.org statistic show that:

· 95% of men who physically abuse their intimate
   partners also psychologically abuse them.

· Psychologically abusive men are more likely to
use a weapon against their partners, have prior
criminal arrests, abuse substances, and have
employment problems.

· An employed woman with an unemployed
partner is more than twice as likely to be
psychologically abused by her partner.

· Having a physical disability increases a
woman’s risk of psychological abuse by 83%.

· Women who earn 65% or more of their
households’ income are more likely to be
psychologically abused.

In the workforce this is a highly common abuse but rarely addressed. We do know now that if you are being psychologically, mentally or verbally abuse you have rights. Your rights have to be addresses to your corporation or business and if that request goes unaddressed you have the right to contact a lawyer. The Chron.com Small Business and Worker's Rights states:
Unlike most first-world countries, there are currently no federal or state laws written to protect U.S. employees from verbal abuse. However, failure to nip an abusive employee's behavior in the bud can cost you big. Under regulations from the federal Occupational Safety and Health Act, or OSHA, you as a business owner can be held liable for not providing an employee with a safe and healthy workplace. An employee faced with verbal abuse can fairly claim that the abuse interferes with her ability to go about her daily job duties. You can be held responsible for retaining the services of an employee who verbally abuses another employee.
If an employee who has been verbally abused is not adequately aided at the company level, she may hire an attorney to take her case to court. Even without precise laws on the books that address the issue, OSHA standards seem to have enough bite to get the attention of courts. For example, the Indiana Supreme Court in 2008 awarded a nurse $325,000 for her claims of intentional infliction of emotional distress and assault after she was screamed at by a surgeon. Once you've heard a hint of abuse occurring within your business, you become part of the problem. You must either address it head on or be prepared to answer for your failure to do so.

This can cost a hefty sum if you are a business owner. 

It is important to understand that to have a balance work environment, a healthy home life and a happy mental attitude you must first learn how to properly address all individuals. And although it is true that we are humans and we do have a tendency to disagree and have different opinions, there should NEVER be a place where you have to put another down to get your point across.

In Psalms 109:1-3 David calls to the Lord saying:
"1 Hold not thy peace, O God of my praise; 2 for the mouth of the wicked and the mouth of the deceitful are opened against me: they have spoken against me with a lying tongue.3 They compassed me about also with words of hatred; and fought against me without a cause."

I read this one time and shared it with my boys always THINK before speaking:
T-Is it True?
H-Is it Helpful or Honest?
I-Is It Inspiring?
N-Is it Necessary?
K-Is it KIND?
If it doesn't fall under any of those guidelines is best not say it at all!

2 comments:

  1. Daniella ValenzuelaMay 29, 2013 at 10:33 PM

    My Story (part one)

    I honestly don't feel comfortable typing this because of the risk of being called an "attention seeker", but If this will help others I will happily oblige on telling my story.

    Well to start out..there was already some people who didn't like me. At school, In neighborhoods, friends of friends. It kind of all started as a little speck at...fifth grade. There is a girl (That I will not name) who I will say ruined six of my school years. Even now the same girl still seems to mentally harass me. Rumors...like dumb elementary type rumors like "Oh did you hear she likes so and so" or "ew she's dumb" or even the things she and her friends say "Ugh...why is she so stupid. that question was so easy" (well excuse me I'm not as smart as you. gosh) That kind of stuff semi bothered me until...She was my "friend" in 8th grade. I knew I shouldn't have trusted her, but I did anyway. We were "friends" the whole year. I went to her church, we went to eachothers houses, birthdays. Then this year she went back to hating me for no reason whatsoever. Oh well...Then I started to think of all the things she said. I will say as I started to grow up I was called..bad things. a Liar, Bitch, whore, a flirt?????? yeah. Around...late January I decided to cope. Yep..cope by self harm. I counted later and found 150 cuts on just one arm. 10 on my right leg and 5 on my left. I have scars now. I went to my internet friends (they are very up-lifting and caring. yes..there are internet people like that. Not everyone on the internet are out there to kill you) and they told me to stop and there was so much to live for. That wasn't the case. I didn't actually WANT to die...yet. People continue to pick on me and there were arguments at home, Grades going down because of pressure, stress, parents arguing (I always felt they were fighting because of me) I couldn't think anymore and that's when I had enough of it. I tried Suicide three times and all failed. the first time it was in 2012 I tried to cut my wrist and just bleed to death. I was too scared.

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  2. Daniella ValenzuelaMay 29, 2013 at 10:34 PM

    (part two)
    Second time..I was veRY VERY close..you have no idea how close I was to killing myself. In early October me and my family was visiting Mexico. We were at our hotel and Me and my dad just got into a very heavy, hurtful argument. I don't remember what was said, but..I remember staring at the ground practically crying my eyes out. I know I didn't show any expression because I wasn't sobbing and I wasn't smiling or anything..I was just crying and tears wouldn't stop and I kept backing more and more into the railing of the balcony that was five stories up. When my dad left to go back inside I was almost about to jump off the balcony when my mom yanked me back and pulled me away from the balcony. But...you know the horrifying thing to it? Was that I heard voices. I felt like I had schizophrenia for about five minutes. I heard LOUD voices saying to me "jump. jump. jump. do it. do it. no one care. no. wait..Don't jump. People love you. Jump. Don't jump. Do it. Get it over with. Don't jump." It was like someone was arguing with them self inside my head and I was being held back from screaming. I desperately wanted to yell "SHUT UP" but I couldn't..I couldn't get anything out. That was the second time...My third time of suicide was actually recently...maybe about..a month ago I was going to overdose...But I decided not to..I told my Mom about all this and I went to ask for help. My friends told me to see counseling, but I don't know. I felt like..I didn't want people to pray for me either..I never wanted anyone to pray for me because..they would pray for a miracle for me right? Like to ask God to be with me and to keep me safe..The thing was is...I didn't want that..I didn't want to be safe..I would have loved to step in front of the next car that drove by a green light. I wanted to truely die. I had it. People hated me so why couldn't I hate myself too? I have been having emotional/mental breakdowns last week and this week. I have talked to people and I will say I am stable...in a way, but I do have suicidal thoughts even today. I will tell you..the person who said "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" was a complete moron. Words DO hurt and they stick in the back of your head. They haunt you sometimes. Words do hurt. That's all I can think of right now.
    The End.

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